The process of self-development is a continual growth process, there is no doubt about that! You will experience, that as soon as you think you have it cracked, the universe will serve up a challenge, a reminder, or something that you have resisted for you to take another look.
It is at times like this we might wonder, have we learned anything? will it ever end? What next? However, it is important in the development process to allow each lesson, each learning to integrate. The more space we give the learning the stronger it becomes and the more embedded it becomes in our way of going about her everyday life.
This integration piece is really, really, important. Sometime all it takes is the light bulb moment, the dawning, and you have it, but sometimes it is the awareness first, then the acknowledgement or the acceptance of that newfound understanding. Just sometimes, when we discover a new facet of our personality, the knock-on effect is that then we start thinking about this discovery in relation to so many aspects of our lives, our upbringing, interpersonal relationships, family, parenting or professionally. This can be overwhelming, and you may get sucked into a cycle of wondering if you ever going to get out of it, improve or move on. If the moment of clarity is big, you may get into a place of being a victim or of blaming someone or something for how you are now. You could move into a cycle of negativity. On the other hand, it may push you to find our more. To learn more, to do more and to change more and that pattern of behaviour could also result in overwhelm.
The idea I wanted to discuss today is the importance of that integration phase when you make that discovery or when you experience that lightbulb moment. The integration phase allows you the space to fully accept it, to own it, to recognise it as yours, your life, your responsibility, your journey.
There is no prescription for this integration, this also complicates matters. However, if you truly connect with yourself, your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs then you will know what you need. For some, you will need to talk it out, for some you will need silence to reflect, for some you will need healing, for some you will need to walk away and come back to it at another time or in another way. However, what is always true is that the message will land in the ‘being’ and not in the ‘doing’. Staying present, inviting more joy, connecting with peace (even if it is challenging).
If you seem to be connecting with the overwhelm and are in a cycle of doing (relevant or irrelevant tasks), would it be possible to look at it a little differently? What if we could view this enlightening moment as simply ‘information’ and view it without judgement? How does that feel?
It really is just that, one more piece of information that will help us on our journey of growth.
It is also true that if you can stay present and step out of the frantic ‘doing’ and focus on the being then we notice the world goes on, there is a bigger plan for all of us and you are in the perfect place for you, for now. It is often in that space that the next step reveals itself and you can be pleasantly surprised at the leap forward you experience in the being, instead of the forcing you feel in the doing.
When it comes to the discoveries, the integration, and the movement beyond, there is always support available. Journaling is a great way to get your thoughts and feelings out and on paper. Family, friends, coaches, and other professionals to hold the space, to support you each step of the way. Reaching out demonstrates your strength.
So just my wish for you today is to have a think about how you allow that integration to happen for you? Love & Light, Máire x